Wet wipe

He opened it and took out a flattened bag of wet wipes and a packet of sherbet.

‘Do you have to be such a wet wipe?’ Then she snorted. ‘Whatever. Who cares? Let’s be real – we don’t know each other, and we’re not going to get to know each other. I have literally no interest in you. We’re both playing for ourselves.[…]’

Thames Water has become the latest object lesson in the predictable and predicted folly of privatised monopolies, aided by a regulator that’s an even bigger wet wipe than the fatbergs bunging up the sewers.